MY HOME...

When I build a home,

I want the grey sofa to be comfy 

The lights to be warm

The smell of lavender and freshly baked cookies to play a sweet lullaby to your heart.

The coffee table will always have an extra cup and the dining table an extra plate.

The bathroom cabinet will have an extra pair of bathroom slippers, clean towels, washcloths, and toothbrushes for those who wish to spend the night. 

There will be flowers in pretty vases that I will pluck from my backyard garden every morning as I listen to the song of the birds, the hymn of trees, and inhale the freshness of the morning air.

My Bible, a gift from my dad for the day I turned 24, will lay under the chipped Bohemian bowl I got during my visit to Morocco.

My memory wall will be full of laminated polaroid photos. Photos of my first day in Texas, my sister's wedding day, my best friends baby showers, and the day I got nominated for the best fashion designer at my local town during the 12th Annual county fair. I will look at all these pictures and many more with tears in my eyes and gratitude in my heart.

The smudges on the walls will remind me of the summer my niece spent with me and for once I experienced motherhood.

The stains on the rug were from the day my friends spent the weekend and we sat on the rug the entire night crying, laughing, laughing while crying, crying while laughing, singing, playing tik tac toe, and reminiscing on the good old days with our mugs full of hot chocolate.

That dirty old doormat will be the first thing you'll see as you walk into the house. It will always embarrass me but somehow I'll always forget to clean it.

I will have prayers written on the wall to get me through those rough days, and geeky jokes to brighten my mood in the evenings when I'm back from work with weary feet and a heavy heart.

Goals of the previous years that I'm yet to accomplish will hauntingly stare at me as I walk past the corridors on my way to bed at 6 in the evening.

That crooked nail stuck on the kitchen counter from that time I tried a DIY project that went awfully wrong will keep reminding me of how horrible I am at DIYs.

But among all these beautiful items that will hold so many memories, my bed will be the best part of all.

                      My pillows will hold my tears                      

                      My blankets, my warmth    

                      My mattress, my weariness

                      and my sheets my scent

I will lay in that bed and just for a moment time will stand still, the noise of the outside world gone and replaced with peace and hope for a better tomorrow.

When I build a home each corner will be laced with items I've chosen with care. In this home, I will grow, learn and love. Grow to be the woman I always dream of becoming, learn to accept the woman I was, and love both of these two women.

 When I build a home I want to be able to say "If you're ever in trouble, come home"

       

****May your walls know joy, may every room hold laughter, and every window open great possibilities.****

                   -Mary Anne Radmacher